Are You an Alienating Parent?

In all the research I have done in attempts to help the kids, or at least place a label on the hurtful and devastating behavior and decisions that keep them involuntarily from their father, I found this article:

Are You an Alienating Parent?

It’s the first article I’ve found directed at the offending parent, and it raises this to-the-point question: “Did I act this way before the divorce or separation?”

Maybe some parents did. Maybe they never quite caught on that the birth of a child means your life is about a little person who depends on you now, not about your own ego and spite and wants. But for other parents, if they still have a speck of heart left, it may open their eyes to the damage they are doing, and where that behavior is coming from.

Here’s an example that just may sound exasperatingly familiar:

…an alienating parent will often call the child when the child is with the other parent and ask the child if he or she is okay – sending the child the message that the other parent isn’t up to the task of caring for him or her. But when the other parent was spending time alone with the child before your divorce or separation, did you call the child repeatedly and ask, “Are you okay? Are you sure you’re okay? You’d tell me if you weren’t okay, wouldn’t you?”

I am always left shaking my head and wondering what alienating parents believe they are accomplishing by destroying their children in order to seek revenge and lash out at the other parent. Even more, I am left wondering how they simply don’t care how much of their shrapnel lands in the kids’ hearts.

About TheSmirkingCat

I am endlessly trying to make sense of a world that has completely and unapologetically lost its mind.
This entry was posted in alienating parents, custody, kids, parental alienation. Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Are You an Alienating Parent?

  1. furiousBall says:

    My kids are leaving on Sunday, I can’t read this post.

  2. Smirking Cat says:

    You seem like you were having a great time with the kids, but even more important, they always look so happy in pictures when they are with you.

  3. Samantha says:

    That is so true!But then you have the opposite, the parent that will have nothing to do with their kid when they are not with them. This is my nephew’s situation. His dad doesn’t call, go to school programs, won’t support sports or anything outside of HIS weekends. Ugh!

  4. Smirking Cat says:

    In a way, they are a lot alike. The alienating parent wants nothing to do with the child except as an object and as a tool to glorify herself/himself. But I get what you are saying.

  5. dragonmctt says:

    What is really sad is that if alienating parents were to read such an article, they would not see themselves, but rather project their behaviors on to us. Makes me nauseous.

  6. Smirking Cat says:

    I know. Alienating parents will simply refuse to recognize themselves or own up to the behavior, and they will continue to fabricate scenarios to support the false allegations they use to justify their behavior. It’s sickening, sad, and pathetic.

  7. macocha says:

    Interesting. This happened recently. We were like WTF is she calling and asking them this??!!! wow!

Don't be shy! Tell me how great I am. Or not. Share your feelings with the group.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s