From about the 5th grade through my first year of marriage, I kept a diary, filling 5-subject notebooks with my impossibly tiny handwriting, my observations and frustrations about the world through the years. I even devoted one journal to the window of time between my ex-husband’s marriage proposal and our wedding day, presenting the book to him that morning as a gift, a preservation of all our preparations, plans, worries, excitement. (A diary about our divorce just didn’t hold the same va-va-voom, though!)

One thing I liked to do was flip back my journals to see what I wrote about that exact day, one year ago.

On July 1st, one year ago, I wrote on this blog about moving to the house where I would wait for Gary and the kids (Moving). I wrote about sending Gary pictures of the house so he would recognize it as home when he got there, so he could picture me there until we were together.

And I wrote about the huge backyard, sized just right for imaginary bear hunts, hide-and-seek, tag, and races. I had to laugh as I re-read that, because that is exactly what we did there. Almost all of my pictures from the kids’ reunion with Gary is in the back yard, running around, playing, the kids tackling and piling up on Gary.

Watching Gary with the kids is indescribable, particularly now, after such hateful attempts to keep them apart. I like wandering into the living room and seeing all 4 kids snuggled against Gary, on his lap, tucked into his neck, on his knee, just to be close to him. The kids look peaceful when they are like this, relaxed, secure.

It is interesting to wonder what I will write about on July 1, 2010. Stay tuned!

*Photo borrowed from Kipina*


About TheSmirkingCat

I am endlessly trying to make sense of a world that has completely and unapologetically lost its mind.
This entry was posted in Gary, home, kids, love, reflection. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Diary

  1. Dijea says:

    Nice. Its nice to know something things come true.

  2. Crys says:

    I too have always kept diaries. It's really interesting not just to see what you were thinking but how much you've grown. 🙂

  3. Smirking Cat says:

    I wish I still had all of them! They would be highly amusing now.

  4. this is a great post… and im so glad for you that a yr. later in DID turn out how you imagined and maybe… still better!

  5. SMILF says:

    This is funny because I am right now doing this exact same thing – going back and looking at what I was writing last year at this time. 🙂 I'm discovering things are much better than they were a year ago! Looking back puts things in perspective a lot of the time.

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