Last summer, I wrote about the kids’ hair turning sickly green from the unmaintained swimming pool at their grandparents’ house, where they have lived with Crow for the past six years and counting. A simple hair washing and basic hygiene, far too much to expect Crow to administer, removed the green instantly, leaving me sad yet again for the kids and their egg donor’s refusal to make even the most basic gestures to actually care for them.
This year, Crow stepped it up and outdid herself, allowing the kids to swim in a pool they described themselves as nasty and green, then considering that dip in the slime water as their bath for two weeks until they came back to us. Dove’s hair was by the worst, dark green throughout, so brittle it practically crumbled if touched.
Now, I recognize that pool water can tint blonde hair green. But I am not talking about a light tint despite reasonable efforts to prevent it. I am talking about hair that was solid, dark green from root to tip. I am talking about not only green, fried hair ready to fall out, but also fingernails and toenails as jagged as razors from not being trimmed and left to just painfully break off, blackheads inside young children’s ears from lack of bathing, splinters left in their flesh for two weeks to become infected, and other signs of abject neglect and complete lack of caring about them as human beings.
When Dove went with me to run some errands shortly after arriving for their final summer week with us, a woman we ran into thought the green in her hair was so dark that it must be deliberate. She actually asked me how we got her hair so green. When I told her it was from swimming in a disgusting pool, she looked horrified.
I helped Dove get the green out of her hair. When her hair was dry, I checked it for any remaining green and told her happily, “No more green! You are 100% blonde again.” Dove grabbed my arm and hugged me tight. I hadn’t realized how much the green hair bothered her or embarrassed her. She is 6; what was she supposed to do about it on her own?
Again I was struck by how little effort Crow is willing to put into actual parenting. She demands the accolades and praise of being a mother, though her contribution to the children’s well-being ended with the final push of labor.
For the record, simply mixing a handful of baking soda into regular shampoo is the magical concoction that removed the dark green shit from the kids’ hair. It took less than 10 minutes. But I suppose that is 10 minutes taken away from adoring herself, and no self-absorbed bitch like Crow would ever tolerate that!