The Perfect Mother’s Day Card

Child SupportHow unfathomably difficult it must be for the poor children to find that one, perfect Mother’s Day card for Crow!  Can you simply imagine their distress and woe?  I mean, where on earth could they possibly discover, in the golden passageways of Hallmark, just-right cards with heartfelt sentiments such as:

“Happy Mother’s Day, Mama!  You taught me everything I know…about lying, stealing, and mooching off of your parents well into middle age.”

Single Parent

Touching, isn’t it?  An on-the-money (no pun intended), proper card hand-picked for Crow, just like this one:

“Our love for you is as deep and bottomless as your massive crow’s feet!”

crow's feet

Fitting, no?  Or how about this tender, poignant sentiment:

“Mommy, in honor of Mother’s Day, can we spend at least one day not talking about how jealous you are of our stepmom?”

Story StepmomYes, it would be hard to choose from all of those touching, emotional adages.  Perhaps it can be best summed up with:

“Let’s go ahead and pretend you are Mommy of the Year today for appearance’s sake.  Next time we go to Daddy’s, we will celebrate with our real parents.”

deadbeat moms

Motherhood is about far more than giving birth.  Happy (early) Mother’s Day to all the women who are true moms to biological or bonus children, and to all the fathers like Gary who pick up the slack are both daddy and mommy for the kids.

any woman

About TheSmirkingCat

I am endlessly trying to make sense of a world that has completely and unapologetically lost its mind.
This entry was posted in bad mother, better than her, crow's feet, malicious mother, stepmom. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to The Perfect Mother’s Day Card

  1. Happy Mother’s Day right back at ya! 🙂

  2. Amy says:

    Love it!

    Happy Mothers Day to the only REAL mom the kids have!

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