How unfathomably difficult it must be for the poor children to find that one, perfect Mother’s Day card for Crow! Can you simply imagine their distress and woe? I mean, where on earth could they possibly discover, in the golden passageways of Hallmark, just-right cards with heartfelt sentiments such as:
“Happy Mother’s Day, Mama! You taught me everything I know…about lying, stealing, and mooching off of your parents well into middle age.”
Touching, isn’t it? An on-the-money (no pun intended), proper card hand-picked for Crow, just like this one:
“Our love for you is as deep and bottomless as your massive crow’s feet!”
Fitting, no? Or how about this tender, poignant sentiment:
“Mommy, in honor of Mother’s Day, can we spend at least one day not talking about how jealous you are of our stepmom?”
“Let’s go ahead and pretend you are Mommy of the Year today for appearance’s sake. Next time we go to Daddy’s, we will celebrate with our real parents.”
Motherhood is about far more than giving birth. Happy (early) Mother’s Day to all the women who are true moms to biological or bonus children, and to all the fathers like Gary who pick up the slack are both daddy and mommy for the kids.