Despite my mother’s best efforts and intentions, I have not voluntarily stepped into a church in years. That doesn’t mean I am not spiritual. I pray every morning, something that might surprise many people who know me in real life. My praying consists mostly of questions and conversations instead of the traditional kneeling, hands-folded praying, but it’s what works for me.
A church not far from me started offering fitness classes, and I was apprehensive at first, worried they would preach and stuff Bible verses down my throat at every opportunity, but I’ve been pleasantly surprised. I love the positive, supportive atmosphere, and the instructors are great. Last night I went to Spinning class, and the instructor is the woman who is going to be leading the half-marathon training group in August.
I ended up being the only student who showed up for class last night, so there was no slacking off, that’s for sure! My legs were burning. I was the only student she had to focus on, so she watched my form and my speed and yelled out encouragement to keep me going. It was an awesome workout.
After class, she asked me, “Can I pray for you?” Well, we were technically in a church (okay, the activities building beside the church, but on church property nonetheless), so I said okay. She bowed her head and thanked God for me being there that night, for deciding to take a journey to better health, and for me to have the strength to focus on the future and not on past stumbles. There was more, but I can’t put it as eloquently as she said it.
I was very touched by it. Here was a very busy woman, who needed to head out to teach another class, and who has many, many students to keep track of and to train and to motivate, and here she was, taking the time to pray for me and encourage me and give me a lift I really needed. Maybe there really was a reason that I was the only one who went to class last night. Maybe it was pure coincidence. Either way, I am glad I was there and that she took the time to do that. It meant an incredible amount to me.
How can I keep abusing my body when she prayed for me, for goodness sake? How do I brush off workouts and eat like a pig, when it would completely disrespect what she did for me?
I don’t know if I can explain why it meant so much to me or how I felt as I listened to her prayer or as I left the building, feeling like I have a true ally, someone who cares if I succeed or fail.
That sounds like I am crapping all over my boyfriend, but I don’t mean that he is not supportive. I think he has just seen me yo-yo, go up and go down, start then stop, so many times, he doesn’t invest much in the process anymore. I don’t blame him. I was over 200 pounds when we met nine years ago. Nearly a decade is a long time for a man to be my weight loss cheerleader!
I hung my 5K training schedule on the wall above my desk at home, and I am crossing off my workouts as I go. So far, so good! I don’t want to let anyone down, including myself.