For countless years, I have been heavily criticized and insulted at every turn for each action, word, and breath inhaled as a stepmom-in-training. (Gary and I will be celebrating ten years together this summer, so pardon me if I actually already consider myself the kids’ stepmom, especially since I am the only mother figure in their lives who doesn’t lie to them, use them, manipulate them, or shove them around like pawns on a game board).
Crow hid behind her womb and slung cheap shots for years, putting me down as a stepmom, as a person, even bad-mouthing me to the kids’ teachers. She devoured every opportunity to smugly pat her own leathery back and pretend to be Mommy of the Year as she obsessed over every move I made and found a way to twist each one into something I am doing horrifically wrong.
So…is it wrong, after years of her behind-my-back slams, that I watch with great amusement as she bungles being a stepmother as badly as she has screwed up being an egg donor?
When Crow pounced upon someone dim-witted and tasteless enough to marry her about three years ago, this Prince Charming with no neck and even less personality came as a package deal with a teenage son. A teenage son, mind you, who apparently doesn’t care much for the bewitching company of Crow, and who has loudly, violently, and repeatedly professed his distaste for her at the top of his lungs.
I would say it’s humorous, except as usual, the kids are paying for Crow’s failures. Being forced to endure their arguing and fighting, and listening to Crow put her stepson down and call him childish names, is probably about as much fun for the kids as listening to her non-stop litanies about Gary and about me.
I have several years’ worth of experience in being a stepmom that I could draw upon to offer her much-needed guidance, if it isn’t already too late. I wouldn’t even smirk or laugh out loud while I dished it out, at least while she was looking. Problem is, someone has to want to be a better person and admit they have made mistakes before they can change. The number one lesson I have learned over nearly ten years is that Crow absolutely, positively, and categorically will never be more than the shrill and bitter blob of hate that she is today, because she has zero ambition to improve herself.
It’s her business if she wants to remain worthless. But when it affects the kids, and it certainly does, then she needs to step up and ameliorate the situation for their sake. I already know she won’t. She thrives on drama and playing the victim, as if her stepson thinking she is a bitch is somehow completely his fault and through no doing or actions of her own.
Crow sucks at being a stepmother just as much as she does at being a mother. It would be ironically funny if it wasn’t so shamefully sad.